When you liked me, I lied to you and said I wasn't interested. Now you have a girlfriend, and I want you more than ever. You will be mine.
I miss you, I miss your smile, I miss the way you'd always hold my hand, I miss they way you'd say my name with a "z" at the end, I miss the way you'd sing to me, I miss the way you always complimented me, I miss the way you talked to me, I miss the way we could sit and talk about everything together, oh and I miss the way you would be so clueless and you never knew how much you hurt me.
I hope you know every time you talk about her to me, it KILLS me inside. I hope you know that I'm crying after you just told me how much you like her. I hope you know that I will always miss what we had. I hope you know I'd kill to go back and change it all, or just relive it. I hope when she breaks your heart, you come back to me. I hope when you come back to me, I'll be strong enough to let you go.
Goodbye bby, I still love you and I know I can't/shouldn't. You've already been forgiven. But we both know you and I could never be. If there's anything I am not looking for, it's facing the day after Christmas alone.. But I promise I'll be strong. I'll see you in another life or maybe in my dreams.
Just read what you wrote. I could never hate you. But it's best for both of us that I never come back. I need to be forgotten, so I can forget (even though we both know that won't happen, it's something I have to do/try.) Just so you know: I'm fine and no matter where on Earth I am, know that I've missed you every fucking second of my life. I had a dream about you about a month ago or so... It was so real and vivid... I cried for hours when i realized it had been a dream. I couldn't sleep for the next 2 nights because I didn't want to be fooled into thinking it was real, again... I didn't want to dream about you. As much as I'd like to and want to say a simple 'hello', I know I can't. I'm never coming back and i mean it. What you are reading will be the only thing I'll ever say to you. At least we'll always have our memories. (: I've held on to those for so long... and yet I've almost completely let go... anyway, I just hope you're happy and doing well like you said you were. But I must ask you to never write to me ever again. It's for the best. I almost hate that i read your message... Oh well, no need to dwell on it. Anyway, be well. Be amazing, like I've always believed you were. Goodbye.
I'm forming a crush on someone from tumblr. I'm not sure if that's possible. I know I'm leading myself into disappointment.
I have a hard time dealing with death. Sometimes, I imagine the departed will one day knock on the door and invite themselves in like they always did.
